Saturday, April 7, 2007

musings, and easter

Happy Easter! It isn't a christian holiday, although it is a pagan holy day. Don't ya just love words? And their origins. I do, for is synonamous with holy day. Isn't that neat? I'm amused by many things, even many people. Even by life in general.
Every day, I am thankful for the people in my life, my family and my friends. I wish all of you a Happy Easter, and my daughters, their husbands, and my grandkids in particular. And in particular, those whom I call friend. I do not choose my friends lightly, and for those I do so desginate, it is for many reasons. One of which is that I find you to be honorable, and trust worthy. Those of you who know me, and are not included...then I guess you just didn't make the mark. You have to be a certain type of individual to be included. This is not to indicate that I'm a snob...I'm not, but I have certain criteria. We all do, even if there are those who refuse to admit it, even themselves.
Speaking of which, we all have things we seldom, if ever, admit to ourselves..let alone to others. This is why it is good for introspection. I think it drives some people nuts the way I'm always analyzing things. Magick is a good eye opener. If you don't know yourself, then how can you know magick? One must know the subject area he wishes to utilize. Manipulating energy, for instance. How can you manipulate it, if you don't know anything about it. That's like being a bear trainer, without having even met a bear before. I pity the fool who will try to do things without first understanding what he's trying.
Yes, I said fool, and this might seem really dumb...but I'd rather be a fool who will go for it, than a wise person who's afraid to try. That's not to say that I'm a fool, or even that I'm a wise person. I haven't met a bear in person, but then I don't think they need to be trained anyway...the only bears I've ever met were in my dreams.
We must always strive to be better, as a person, and at that which we try to do. I suppose most of you are wondering...Why do I not use the magick since my life seems so screwed up. Number one is because it isn't screwed up, and I don't use magick lightly. I don't live life lightly either. Magick is my way of life. I do use magick. I do as I feel I should. It works for me. I don't use magick like a bunch of parlor tricks. I use it for living...I read once that we are not what we think we are, but rather what we think. If that is true, then I am magick. Maybe the technique needs work? Nah, just me.
I doubt if this is making much sense to some people, but that is ok. It's just me rambling on this fine saturday morning.Do I wish things were different? Sometimes. When I do, I scrap plan B, and go back to plan A. What are they? You tell me. I'm just teh author of this blog. Actually I don't make plans, you make plans, the gods laugh. So they say. Actually, I just take it as it comes...except when I don't like the way it is...then I work on it, and most of that is mental working. There's no point in bitching about things you don't like if you aren't willing to take charge of your life and make it the way you want. I mean, look I'm the one responsible for how my life is. I've made many mistakes, and that's ok, I've learned from them. Now is the time for a premptive strike, an insurgency of focus. You must concentrate, focus, on that which you want...not those things you don't. I know from past experience, that whatever it is that I think I want, will come to me. I may not really want that particular thing, but until I can totally define it, which means all pertinent details are clear in my mind, I'll get what I thought I wanted. Not what I really want. So unless I am willing to take the time to get it right in my mind, I'm doomed to half assed attempts at what I want. This is true of any one. This is another reason it is important to get one's mind in order, and to learn all you can about yourself. What makes me do the things I do? Fine I did it because of whatever, so why did I think I needed to do that? Really? Why was that?
Shakespeare says to thine ownself be true. Someone else said know thyself. These are the best things to do. That advice is most important. If you give up on yourself, what right do you have to expect someone else to believe in you? Aren't you important enough to believe in? Hell, I believe in me. I don't seek or need the approval of anyone other than myself. And I sure as hell don't need anyone's permission to do whatever it is that I choose to do. Each of us, in our own, is special, even unique...regardless of where we came from or where we are right now. I seek, as an individual, to be accepted for myself, as I am. My friends usually do, it's the other people who don't. If I can accept you as you are, why not afford me the same courtesy?
I am not perfect, and neither are you. But we are supposed to be working on it. We are gods in tthe making, and that means we must learn to manipulate our reality to reflect what we want. Our reality reflects what we now believe, as we change what we believe, our reality reflects those changes. This is how it works, as simple and as complicated as it is. Our subconscious minds is what we use, it won't accept what we don't believe deep down. Our health for instance, our real self is always in perfect health, but what we believe is what is reflected in our physical bodies. We need to sow flowers, and good seeds in our unconscious minds, not weeds. By telling our subconscious minds what we believe, we are starting to reflect our beliefs into our physical reality. It takes time, for most of us, we have a lifetime of bad thought habits to reverse. To learn how to change. But this one of the reasons for this life, to learn how to manipulate our reality. To learn how to change our thinking. Thoughts are things not yet brought into manifestation. Jesus talked about faith. Except ye believe. Without a divided mind. This is exactly what I'm talking about...I'm jsut looking at it from a magickal point of view. If I believe I'm rich, it's because I am. But then you may ask, why then am I poor? What is your defination of poor? Monetarily? Yes...but I'm working on that one, Health, it's not bad, needs I'm working on it. But I am rich in ways you may not see. I can multitask naturally, most people need to use windows or some other operating system. I love myself, just as I am. I like me, and as I read about a month or so ago in a profile..."hell, if I were sitiing next to me, I'd buy me a beer."
As to my making my business public, I'm not sharing anything I'd not share with a friend. Furthermore, many things I share with friends, I don't put online. Just because you read things here, don't assume that I tell all...I don't. I'm actually a very private person. There are things that I haven't shared with my friends, and there are things I haven't shared with family, boyfriends, women I've known, and even my ex. I didn't consider it their business. Anyway, in some of these instances, since I would be the one blamed, regardless of who was at fault...why bother? Seems to me it's a moot point. Now my friends, that might be a different matter. Even so, I'm not going to be a burden to them either. Seems as if some people think I'm a burden, even when I'm holding my own, and helping them in different ways. That is a losing situation, in which I'm not going to place myself. I prefer win-win situations. One is not a burden if they are making contributions to the relationship. So for those of you who think I am, think again. It's you who has the problem.
On another note, cowardice is an overwhelming fear of taking action. I have taken actions that have seemed foolhardy to some, even to family. In my opinion, a real man, or real woman, is one who faces his/her fears and does what needs to be done. So if that is a coward...seems to me someone needs to read a dictionary. I am in the habit of making a stand when in the right, of handling things my way, of taking action when needed..whatever kind is needed.
I guess it's time to stop the rambling...seems to me this is already the size of a dime store novel.
Again....Happy Easter,