Tuesday, April 3, 2007

what can I say?

I've decided, I'm going to give Dave another chance. I really do love him, but I am not going to be controlled by him or anyone else. You know, a person who seeks/needs to control another person has a fundamental flaw in their makeup. It's called low self-esteem. Because they can't control their life, they seek to control at least one thing in their life...usually their g/f, lover, spouse, significant other. They need to work on the way they feel about themselves. And to listen to what is and is not being said. There will be fewer misunderstandings that way.
I really do understand where he's coming from, and even why he felt the way he did. But it doesn't change the way I feel, either. I can control my life, thank you. I don't come with ownership papers, or even a leash. For those who think I do, get it thru your head...keep walking. I don't need you. I need an equal, not someone who can be easily led, or someone who seeks to lead. Yes I will come to you for advice, then follow my own, after taking yours' into consideration.
We all need to work on our past or other issues; if we don't, they have a way of knocking us for a loop. They did me. I felt as if I had been abused. I know, in my mind, and in my heart, that he did not intend this. And since I've been where he is now, I can be tolerant of his attitude...as long as he is willing to work on the issue. I'm not other people he's had in his life. I'm me. Ah hell...we all screw up at least once in a while. I do love ya baby. Miss ya too.

1 comment:

Jerry said...

Good luck to both of you.Hope it works out this time. Relationships take work and understanding from both of you.