Friday, May 25, 2007

Friday, and grief

Hello All,
I guess this is as good a subject as any. Here are a few facts about Friday, followed by the subject of grief.

Friday (pron. IPA: [fɹaɪ.deɪ] or [fɹaɪ.di]) is traditionally considered the sixth day of the week, falling between Thursday and Saturday, as it does in countries that adopt a Sunday-first convention (see Days of the week for more on the different conventions). In countries adopting the Monday-first, and, in work-based conventions, it is the fifth day of those weeks.
The name Friday comes from the Old English frigedæg, meaning the day of Frige the Anglo-Saxon form of Frigg, the Germanic goddess of beauty. In most Germanic languages it is named after Freyja—such as Freitag in Modern German, vrijdag in Dutch, fredag in Swedish, Norwegian, and Danish—but Freyja and Frigg are frequently identified with each other. The word for Friday in most Romance languages is derived from the name of Venus such as vendredi in French, venerdì in Italian, viernes in Spanish, and vineri in Romanian. In Hindi, Friday is Shukravar, named for Shukra, the Sanskrit name of the planet Venus. Russian uses an ordinal number for this day of the week-- piatnítsa, meaning "fifth." Similarly, the Portuguese is sexta-feira.
In Japan, Friday is Kin-Youbi: "Gold Day" or "money day", and in many Asian cultures, paydays are on Fridays.
In most countries with a five-day work week, Friday is the last workday before the weekend and is, therefore, viewed as a cause for celebration or relief. In some offices, employees are allowed to wear less formal attire on Fridays, known as Casual Friday or Dress-Down Friday.
Also Friday is associated, in Astrology, with Venus, the Goddess of love, which is why love spells are done on Friday. although other spells can also be done on Fridays.

Now on to the subject of grief. It hasn't been even a month yet since Deuce's death. So why am I going on the way I am? Because I refuse to live in the past. There is nothing I can do to change this event, therefore I have accepted it. I will live as I want, and as I believe Charlie would want me too. Suck it up, get over it, grin and bear it, and get on with it. Sometimes keeping busy, but in a balanced way, is the best thing to do. I also need to be around other people sometimes. I need to meet other people. Learn new things, do things, especially things I enjoy. I'm pretty much ok, then find myself almost unbearably sad, this too passes pretty quickly. I keep asking him why, and yet I know why. This was part of my life plan, and one of my life lessons. How to love someone as I did him, and deal with the grief. If you think I'm going to just stop living, and grieve forever, forget it. I will always remember him, and I will always cherish the memories we made, I will even love him for always. But I will not stop living just to appease anyone. No one has said anything, and yet I can feel disapproval from somewhere. That sounds like a personal problem to me. It sure as hell isn't my problem, and I have no intention of making it mine. Thanks, but I already have enough of my own.
Love comes in a multitude of depths, and so does grief. I could choose to dishonor his memory by letting grief debilitate me for the rest of my life. But what purpose would that serve? I have my own idea about how to handle this. One of the things that has helped me to cope with this, is when he was in the hospital...I talked to him and felt and heard his answers. And then when I'm down, I can hear him in my head. His jokes, our conversations, plus I also have some of his text messages saved on the cell, which he was responsible for getting for me. I have his pics, some of his personal items, etc. I cope. Period. In my own way, and don't think I'm living in the past, I live in the present as much as possible. I'm moving on, because that's what I need to do.
May Peace find all who seek her. On another note, if even half of what I suspect will happen with the geophysical changes here on the earth...we're all going to need to pull together and we'll definitely need peace of mind.


DSG said...

Raven, need to keep on keeping on.. as you are... dont let anything stand in your way.. you deserve to be happy... and if somebody has a problem with the way ANYONE deals with grief.. it's a personal problem.. and they're trying to change the person thats greiving..i could go on about control issues.. maybe even some pride issues involved..anyhow.. enough keep doing what your great at.. and you'll be fine.. but you dont need anyone to tell you that....Take care,..

ravnone1 said...

Thank you, DSG. No one has said anything, but the feeling is coming from somewhere. And, I'll be keeping on, if ya know what I mean. Git-R-Done. LOL