I have been asked "How many times have you been in love?" I replied, "Many times."
While this may seem untrue, it isn't. There are many depths of love, as there are many types of love. I loved deeply twice, but been in love on a much lesser degree a few times. May my next love be as deep as it was with Charlie, although I have no wish to make a comparison between them. I love my friends, as friends. I have been in lust a few times as well. But that is neither here nor there.
How does on tell if one is in love? How does one tell if it is real? If you spend most of your time thinking about the other person in your life, and you feel lost without him/her, there's a good chance it's love. Unless you're obsessed. Have I ever been obsessed with anyone? I don't think so, although there may be a fine line between love and obsession.
Now on to other things.
I keep thinking about how things are as opposed to how they can be. It seems to me that people can bitch and whine about how things are, or they can start the process of different thinking so as to change things. How does one think differently than they are use too? First thing is to learn right thinking, then starting to cancel out the things that are wrong. You can't continue to think in your present mode, if you want things to get better. I do the same thing sometimes, and each time I cancel out the negative thoughts.
Look, what you focus on is what you bring into your life. To focus is to think intently about a particular thing. This is how you bring things into your life. So if you want things to be different, then learn to change your thinking. Stop feeling as if everything and everyone is against you, and do something about it. You can't change how people are, but you can change your reactions to people. Start acting, and stop reacting in your normal manner.
Look, do you want the real thing? Or just a rendition of what you hope to have? It's up to you.
Until then, peace...may she find you a willing recipient.